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On Beyond BalanceAs a coach for senior executives, many of whom are stressed out by incredibly busy lives and impossibly competing commitments, I often hear
requests for help in achieving better “work-life balance.” That sense of being constantly out of balance between the demands of the job and the requirements of the home and family seems to afflict women executives more than men, but it certainly isn’t exclusive to them. Sometimes it seems as though equality of the sexes in the workplace has just spread the pain of being torn in different directions.
Usually, these busy executives are looking for the magic bullet, for some powerful methodology or practice that will neatly resolve the dilemma for them. “I need a better time management system” is one I hear a lot. Or “I need to figure out how to do more of my work at home.” I’m fond of pointing out that none of us can “manage” time, time happens with or without us at the same rate of speed. It’s what we choose to do with it that creates the
problem, so what we have to manage is ourselves. I recently reviewed a book, Beyond Juggling, that calls for adopting a set of strategies to do just that, as opposed to applying time management tips. Recently, though, I have been thinking about the balance question in a
whole new way, found in the distinction between living a “balanced” life, and living an “integrated” life. Here are seven strategies, choices you can make for an integrated life: - Give up the idea that there’s “work” and there’s “life”. Isn’t it all life?
- Design your work to fit the life you want, and your life to complement
your work (vs. to support it.) Think about when, where, and how you want to work so that it blends more seamlessly into when, where, and how you do your life.
- Be “out there”, in both work and life. Live as though you are your work, vs. your work defines who you are. Get curious about your world and everything in it, and get comfortable with not knowing all the answers all the time.
- Decide what your life is about, and live all of it that way. What is
your purpose? Seek authenticity in all domains of life, be who you really are, all the time.
- Work with people you want to be with. Why not be friends with your clients, colleagues, and customers? It’s less about setting boundaries than it is about being respectful and compassionate towards others, and being “clean” (honest and appropriate) in your relationships.
- Give up the idea that you can “achieve” balance (or integration!) You
will always be a work in progress, and you will never get there. So? Forgive yourself for not being perfect.
- Not everything in work and in life is that serious. It’s not all about life and death. And, it’s not all about you, either. Try thinking about “my life as a comedy” once in a while to bring yourself back to earth.
(Thanks to my client N.E., who has chosen to live an integrated life and
encouraged me to put this in writing.) 
More than eight out of 10 Americans say their personal stance on political issues is not affected by what any entertainment personality says, according to a recent poll. Furthermore, nearly two out of three (64%) say celebrities are "not too effective" or "not effective at all" in influencing
Washington decision-makers. But, as the pollsters point out, the highly politicized poll ratings of celebrities indicate that a substantial percentage of Americans are listening to what celebrities have to say, even if they report it has no bearing on their own views. A slight majority of Americans say they are paying more attention to government terror alerts than they did a year ago. Sixty percent say they
have stockpiles of food and water in their homes in case of a terrorist attack, while 40% say they do not have such stockpiles. Men are more likely than women (48% vs. 39%) to say their families are ready for a terrorist attack. The World Health Organization reports that 340 million people worldwide are victims of depression. WHO predicts that depression "will be the second leading cause of worldwide disability by 2020." 
The title of a new book by Howard Rheingold, smart mobs are interconnected groups of people who are using technological advances in
new and important ways. Examples of these social networks include those that use texting, p2p networks, digital cities, and reputation systems. 
 How The Way We Talk Can Change The Way We Work, by Robert Kegan and Lisa Laskow Lahey. What I like about it: The authors, both psychologists, explain why the changes we make so seldom seem to stick. They look at how our language creates our reality, and then guide us through a very accessible methodology for transforming the
way we talk. Rich in both theory and practice.
Beth Bloomfield
Executive Coach, Strategy Consultant
Principal, Bloomfield Associates  Longitudes and Latitudes, by Thomas Friedman. What I like about it: it’s a collection of his New York Times columns exploring the Muslim world to try to better understand September 11. In doing this he reflects on the connectedness that the Internet has brought across national
boundaries. He concludes that this connectedness is functional, useful and real but ultimately superficial because the ability to integrate at the level of technology has run ahead of the ability to understand each other at the cultural level. Building understanding won’t be done through technology but the old fashioned way -through people participating in exchange and outreach programs, diplomacy, and building friendships at the personal level.
Carmen Zanetti
Principal,
Thinking Outside the Square Consultancy
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"If you do not change direction, you are likely to end up where you are headed."
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The Georgetown University Leadership Coaching Certificate Program, where Beth Bloomfield is a faculty member, has been granted accreditation by the International Coach
Federation. This recognition is given only to high-quality coach training schools who are philosophically aligned and who teach in alignment with the ICF's approach to professional coaching, with the intent of upholding the highest standards in the industry. A highly-recommended one-day workshop on “The Practice of Dialogue” for professional coaches, consultants, and facilitators, will be presented by Dialogue practitioners Alicia Rodriguez and Judith O’Brien on
March 28, 2003, at Bon Secours retreat center in the Washington-Baltimore area. Dialogue has been defined as an open, divergent, respectful conversation among a group of people, out of which may emerge a deeper understanding, something creative. Dialogue derives its strength from the inclusion of diverse perspectives and it derives its power from the voice of the collective. It is most effective in creating conversations that open the group to possibilities beyond what has previously been
considered, and it removes the blocks to the transformation of problem into opportunity. The regular practice of dialogue can be used as a tool for cultural change and innovation in corporations, small businesses and organizations. Click here for more information. | | | | | At Bloomfield Associates, we believe the best way to appreciate the benefits of coaching is not just to read about it, but to experience it for yourself. That’s why we offer a no-cost, no-obligation coaching consultation where you can be coached by a professional, certified executive coach. Click here or call 410-626-6008 to schedule an appointment. | | | |
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