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Empty Boat This is a true story. Recently several sailing friends of mine were delivering a boat from
warmer waters back to this area for the coming sailing season, when they spotted another boat in the distance out on the open ocean. After several failed attempts to raise anyone on the radio, they decided to investigate, and after a rather harrowing approach as night fell, they found that there was no one aboard. The boat was actually sailing itself, and had apparently been doing so for some time, given its tattered sails.
Of course, there's much more to the story, and since the plot is still unfolding, I'll put it aside for now. But as I listened to my friends' amazing story, I remembered a favorite old tale, a Zen story recounted by Pema Chodron in her excellent book Start Where You Are:
A man is enjoying himself on a river at dusk. He sees another boat coming down the river toward him. At first it seems so nice to him that someone else is enjoying the river on a nice summer evening. Then he realizes that the boat is coming right toward him, faster and faster. He begins to get upset and starts to yell, "Hey, hey, watch out! For Pete's
sake, turn aside!" But the boat just comes faster and faster, right toward him. By this time he's standing up in his boat, screaming and shaking his fist, and then the boat smashes right into him. He sees that it's an empty boat. The point is that we are just that quick to make up our own stories to explain why surprising things happen to us, and usually someone else is to blame for our troubles.
We can work up quite a bit of anger and resentment at someone else without even knowing the facts. And sometimes things really do have to smash right into you before you can see that no one is out to get you, sometimes life just happens and you happen to be in the way. There are a lot of people out there screaming at empty boats. As a leader, your own stories about why things happen can easily become the world
view of your whole team or the whole organization, one reason why it's so important to be aware of your own thinking and how it shapes your interpretation of events. The power to "write" the story for others is a key role of leadership, and how you tell the story can set the mood and influence the actions of your listeners. Blaming others for unanticipated problems is a tempting plot device, but it seldom leads to the best results for your organization.
There's a risk, too, in not offering explanations for events, especially bad surprises: people will tend to make up their own stories, and amazingly often, you are not the hero. You may even find yourself cast in the role of the one who is to blame. Without a shared story, there will emerge lots of little stories, making it even more difficult to get people to pull together when you need them to.
How can you learn to tell the kind of stories that will both rally your team, and keep them focused productively? The first, and probably most important, step is to become aware of the stories you tell yourself, and to recognize the situations that trigger them. When you can stop yourself and remain open to other possible interpretations of the surprises that come at you, you'll be more able to lead a group of people to respond effectively. Coaching can support you in developing greater self-awareness as a leader in your
organization. Call (410)626-6008, or email info@bloomfieldassociates.com to explore your options. 
Reflect on your own version of the empty boat, and how it shows up for you in various aspects of your life: work, family, friendships, civic responsibilities. Do you notice any patterns in your stories about unpleasant surprises? What is the thinking that underlies the stories you
tell yourself? Can you remember situations earlier in your life when these stories were first formed? Maybe you heard them from parents, teachers, or bosses. In what ways do your stories continue to serve you? How might they be getting in your way? What would it take for you to develop some new stories for yourself and the team that you lead? |
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More than 100 of the top 250 television and print advertisers in the US spend less than 1% of their budget targeting the Hispanic market, according to the magazine Darwin. Employers have been using the Web as a recruiting tool for almost a decade, but online hiring surpassed more traditional sources for the first time in 2005, according to a new study by Booz Allen Hamilton.
A recent survey by Dogster Inc. and job search engine Simply Hired finds that 66% of dog lovers would "work longer hours if they were allowed to bring their dogs to work." Another 32% say they would accept a cut in pay if they could bring their dog to the office. 
Moral Liability
Defined as the situation "when a company violates stakeholder expectations of ethical behavior in such a way as to put business value at risk" by Business Ethics columnist Marjorie Kelly. She cites the emergence of this new phrase as an example of the "re-languaging" of business necessary to shift away from a too-narrow focus on numbers and short-term considerations. 
 The Paradox of Choice: Why More is Less, by Barry Schwartz. What I like about it: The author reveals to us what has become almost transparent
in the modern world---that we simply have too much choice. Remember the days when to purchase jeans all we needed to know was our waist and length and we went and bought a pair of Levi's? Not any more. He uses research to underscore the abundance of choice not only in the products we buy, but in the lifestyles we choose and in basic services such as utilities and healthcare. The paradox is that instead of making our lives better, the opposite is true,
it has put us into a mode of attempting to compare and choose among all the choices all the time.
Sheryl Phillips
Executive Coach and Organizational Consultant,
Sheryl D. Phillips Consulting
 Crash, directed by Peter Haggis. What I like about it: Although it does entertain, this Academy Award winner takes an unrelenting look at
ignorance, intolerance and prejudice in our society today. Bottom line: nobody is immune. It's a good movie to watch with a group of friends, because it will provoke plenty of discussion, and hopefully some continuing reflection.
Beth Bloomfield
Executive Coach, Strategy Consultant
Principal, Bloomfield Associates Share what you're into - books, articles, movies, music, websites - with others on the list! Send us the title and author or other pertinent information, along with a sentence or two on what you like about it, and if we use it in A Different Optic
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"When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us."
- Helen Keller | |
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